It’s not about “The One” but about who’s good for you

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You want that epic love, I feel you…because I’m guilty of it too.

I believe fairytale romances like the movies do exist but it isn’t common. Most of us will never feel that kind of rush. That’s what it really boils down to… a rush. The excitement, the butterflies…and there’s usually a little drama in the mix as well.

I think reality has kicked in for me now that I’m much older. Full disclosure – I still binge-watch Twilight 😍

Do I want any kind of drama in my relationships at 38? No thanks. I prefer to not have petty arguments. I don’t want an insecure person that will go through my phone. I don’t want to fight about your friends or mine. What I can or can’t do. I know some people thrive off of relationships like that. But for people who’ve grown into who they are, secure and happy individuals…we don’t want any of those things.

Us hopeless romantics crave sparks in our hearts. We probably can have true magical love but with some less ideal standards. Maybe it can’t always be magical 😒

I can do without a Notebook kind of love. We have to give up that love at first sight notion. Some of the boxes may not be checked off. You’re not going to get it all. You can have everything most important to you though. I would never say settle for less.

For me personally, I’d like someone who falls somewhat effortlessly into my life as I into theirs. There will always be some compromises to make but our foundation is one and the same. The path we walk on go in the same direction.

Instead of just looking for that love at first sight encounter, stay open to someone that may not be your ideal partner initially. Like for me, Minka Kelly…I’d love to have my very own Minka Kelly 🤣 but that probably won’t ever happen. My friends say I’m picky…I don’t think I am. I’ve dated people who weren’t ideally my type. Then again, I didn’t stay in those relationships for too long either. Hmm…what does this really mean for me? Self-analysis is going on now.

What are you willing to sacrifice? What are you not? And these have to be honest answers that you can live with for the rest of your life. As I ask you these questions, I ask myself the same as well.

I’ve been searching for that epic love that just isn’t realistic. “The One” isn’t the perfect woman I made up in my fantasy land. I think “The One” will be someone who is good for me. Someone who compliments me, challenges me and helps me grow in areas where I lack. The One will love me unconditionally. Someone who lifts me up and never puts me down. The One will expect no less from me in return because she also knows her worth. The One may not be as clean as me 🤨 The One may stay up too late and wake up after I’ve done 3 loads of laundry. The One may be a little rough around the edges and not as soft as Minka 🤷‍♀️

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So you see, I do know what I want and what I am willing to overlook. I’m sure you do too. Us well put together women (and men), we can be too idealistic. Maybe we just need to give more people a chance and swipe left a little slower??? The One who is good for you may not come in the exact package you’d like. But who knows what could happen if you give it a chance.

I’m so not an expert on love. Still navigating it myself. Maybe one day I’ll know what falling in love truly feels like.

 

 

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

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