Tag: love

Stockton Woman Organize The Distribution Of Food And Clothing To The Homeless

I love stories like these. All it takes is one person to make a difference in someone’s life.

https://www.recordnet.com/news/20181111/stockton-women-organize-distribution-of-food-clothing-to-homeless-on-west-weber-avenue

You don’t need to be involved with any organizations to help. Most of my volunteering has been done alone. Well, I drag my son to almost everything 😎 It’s always been very important to me that he sees life outside of his own. He’s pretty sheltered…as he should be. BUT, I do expose him to the world as a whole. To not be naive. To care. It’s easy to judge someone when you don’t know the story. I’ve seen entire families in shelters. A mom and her teenage son. That could very well easily be me with one mishap.

Here’s a picture of my son and his friend. (these are older pictures from one of our crusades) We went to Walmart to purchase school supplies and delivered it to the Stockton Food Bank. The woman asked us as we were handing her our bags…” what organization are you guys with?” I told her we weren’t with any, it was just us. She smiled and said it was very nice of us for doing this. I spent no more than $100 and got a whole bunch of things. And the entire $100 wasn’t even all out of my own pocket. I literally sent texts to a few of my friends that I knew would help 🙂 I even offer pickups for food donations. Like, you don’t even have to leave your house. Just take 10 minutes to clear out your pantry and I’m on my way. My point is, no matter how small the effort…it makes a difference. It’s all around just good vibes. Helping one another out. There’s just so much abundance available for everyone. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around why our children are starving around the world.

The holidays are coming up and it’s a reminder for me every year to stop and look at the world again. I forget sometimes and take things for granted. There’s no greater feeling than to love and have love surround you. And when I see that love being spread out amongst strangers, it brings a profound sense to my soul of how beautiful we the people really are.

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You Have To Experience The Wrong Kind Of Love, In Order To Appreciate It When It’s Right

I can relate.

You Have To Experience The Wrong Kind Of Love, In Order To Appreciate It When It’s Right

When I was sixteen, love was hidden within pain. It was the knowledge of something so real, and so big, a little too early, before love even knew how to react to a girl who felt so deeply. So instead, love was “You’re ugly” and “I’d never date someone like you.” Love was “You have fat thighs” and years of verbal abuse. Yet love was something I still felt through the torment, it was an immature heart playing with my own, and years later even an apology wouldn’t scrub away the confusion of its game. Love was hurt.

When I was nineteen, love was a boy with too many options. Love was canceled plans and one-sided effort. Love was convenience and a different bed in every city. Love was apathy, until the options went away. Then love was an abundance of determination, a sudden knowledge of how valuable my heart was. Love was “Now that I don’t have anything else going on, I can commit to you.” Love was “Now that you are growing into your own, now that you have attention, I am finally ready to claim you before anyone else does.” Love was selfish. Love was too little too late.

When I was twenty-three, love was a spontaneous unknown; a need to believe in two people beating the odds. Love was a contradiction. It was turbulence and nights under New York City. It was “I miss you, but I don’t have the time to call you right now.” It was “I can’t wait to see you, but until then I’ll fill my time with other prospects.” It was “You are the woman who inspires me, who makes me want to be a better man, but I am not going to fight for this.” It was “You are everything to me, but I am busy.” Love was always busy.

And then, when I was twenty-four, love finally introduced itself to me. It said, “I am sorry for what you have been through, but you needed to experience everything I was not, in order to appreciate everything that I truly am.”

Suddenly, love was mornings spent laughing until I cried. It was having someone make time for me. Love was airport gates until it turned into “I am moving across the country to be with you.” Love was “After work I’m driving for two hours just to fall asleep in your arms” and “I want to give you everything you deserve; I want to show you just how much someone can adore you.” Love was whole. It was assured, it existed within certainty and ruthless declaration. It wasn’t built on the foundation of empty promises, it wasn’t bred from pain, or confusion, or apathy. Love was bred from choice. From maturity, from presence. Love was suddenly more beautiful than I had ever imagined, something that blew every old feeling and past name away in the path it was forging. Love was peace.

After all of those years, love was finally peace.
Love was finally real.

Via~ Thought Catalog

Bianca Sparacino 

 

 

Photo credit ~ http://saites.info

You had a good thing, right in front of you

You had a good thing, right in front of you. 

If you reached for me, I’d be there.

And I would always be…

there to comfort you when you needed to be held.

there to kiss you when you’d ask.

there to listen when you needed to be heard.

You had a good thing, right in front of you.

Until…

You took me for granted.

When you refused to hear me.

When I opened up and received nothing from you in return.

I kept giving because you kept asking.

You wanted effort and that I gave.

How foolish of me to not have learned when you left me to drown the first time. I stayed around still and that made you happy. It reassured you…that you were still who I wanted. I did it, happily.

So pathetic, blinded from the truth. What was my role in this charade?

I needed to work for you. Prove myself to you. I ran circles in my mind because your words kept us in a non-commital state.

I still needed to work, some more for you.

How did I get so lost?

It’s 3 am now and it hits me. I’m paying for the past. Righting any wrongs, I may have done. It must be.

A karmic lesson.

I thought maybe you were more…maybe a meant to be.

It’s easy to get lost in the fantasy of happily ever after. Deep down inside with all the contemplating and resisting, I knew. I was trying my best to blend oil and water. Just maybe by some miracle, it may work.

You made me feel alone more times than cared for. You were a lesson that brought up the forgotten pain from the past. I’ve discovered they’re still… kind of alive. DEEP, DEEP inside. But guess what else I also realized…

(What was all this working for you nonsense for again?)

It’s not that I don’t deserve you, although that’s what you might think. The truth is…I deserve more. It’s you that doesn’t deserve me. 

In case you need me to repeat myself. YOU DON’T DESERVE ME.

But hey, in the end, all that doesn’t really matter. All I know is I NEED and WANT MORE. Not someone I have to prove my worthiness too. Not someone who doesn’t value who I am.

You’ve lost me.

You were too stuck in your own mind to really see me. You forced me away in an unforgiving way.

I’m a bit angry. But it’s actually...just sad, really…

You had a good thing, right in front of you.

 

 

Photo credit @ Rebel Circus