The word family…what does it mean? True lineage is blood relation correct? How about your husband or wife? I guess family isn’t so easily explained.
It’s the holidays here in the US. We make a really big deal about Black Friday and Christmas presents. Some of us spend it alone. Some of us spend it with family we can’t stand. Some of us are lucky and spend it with people we truly love and have the greatest time. (This post should have been published last week…oops. I hope you had a great Christmas!)
I want to tell you a little about my background 🧏♀️ I come from a family of 4. My son, my dog, my mom and myself. (Lucy, I didn’t forget you. You are my heart) They have been the constant in my life. Well…Tyson came in about 5 years ago 🐕🦺 And truth be told my mom and I haven’t had a really healthy relationship. We’ve had somewhat of a distant kinship since I left home. It’s been about 15 years or so. BUT, God decided that had to change. A few years ago she moved in with me and it’s been quite the ride. So I guess she counts LOL
I’ve had a plethora of “friends” and friends who were “like family.” I’ve been in long term relationships where we intertwined our special occasions with each other’s family. Pretending like we’re ALL family. Well, we were, until we went our separate ways and I never saw or spoke to those people again. It’s just the natural order of things, right?
As I enter the holidays preparing for the ending of another year, I look around and think to myself, so much has changed. I have a very tiny “family” now…but I’ve never felt more love in my heart. I use to feel so alone when I had “best friends.” Those relationships came with so much pull back and forth. It wasn’t like… I love and value you and expect nothing in return. It was always…I enjoy your company when I need it. I love how you’re so open with your ear and give so freely with your advice. I like that you’re free with your time and money. I love that you’re not so depressing because you allow me to be. These were people who saw our relationship as conditional. And they probably didn’t even know it. I for sure wasn’t an angel either. I had my issues. The only difference is, I chose to work on myself. I didn’t like who I was and I forced myself to do the lonely, dark, hard work. I can’t say the same for them.
It’s a sad realization. People I once loved are strangers now. Still, they all meant so much to me. It’s been painful having to let these relationships go. But I’ve outgrown who I was. There’s a fork in the road and we’re not going in the same direction anymore. We have many chapters that end in our life. This time around for me, I feel like I’m closing the door to an entire book. My old life. Who I was. The last 37 years.
You might be wondering how it’s possible that I feel so much love now. It’s because I’m free from obligation. My relationships are mutually beneficial. As in, we’re energetically on the same level. When you awaken, there is no more room for toxicity and drama. You arrive at a place where you’re just so grateful to be alive. Once you clear out past karmic relationships and learned lessons, you are FREE! You realize how much control you truly have over your own existence. It’s beautiful.
I don’t really do resolutions anymore. Goal setting and planning are imprinted in my soul. It’s like my natural state of being, haha. At least in this life anyway.
Peace and harmony are of the utmost importance to me now. So that’s what I want going into 2020. Heck…that’s what I want for the remainder of my life. The old house has been demolished and it’s my time to build a new one. I’m not going into this new decade blindly. I’m not going into it with the wrong relationships either. I have complete control of how I want to feel…to be…to live.
I’m wishing you all so much love and happiness for this year ahead. I hope you guys know that you are never alone. God, Source Energy…whatever you wanna call it- IS ALWAYS WITH YOU AND LOVES YOU UNCONDITIONALLY.
Happy freaken New Year! 🎆🎉🎊