It’s been two months since I posted??? OMG! I can’t even say it’s writers block because there is so much going on and I have tons to say about it. Smh. ::sighs:: I think I’ve just been really busy. Especially in my head, lol. Sometimes I find myself being busy for nothing. I dabble in too much. Waaaay too much. These past few months I’ve crawled into a little shell. A shell that exists in my mind of course. We all need a little solitude right? Right.
I’ve taken something new on. Surprise, surprise!!! 😂😂😂 It’s different this time though. I swear, lol. I’ve really, really gone within to think about what the hell is it I’m suppose to do with my life.
Conclusion: I want freedom. I want to be able to do what I’m meant to do. Save the world and dabble in everything 😄 I’m sure now. It’s not money…although I need money to be free. Free with my time. I don’t care for titles. I don’t care about what people think anymore. Like I’m suppose to be HERE…because you’re THERE. I have no desire to be better than anyone. I have no reason to prove myself to anyone anymore. People don’t know where I come from. What I’ve come out of and how many road blocks I’ve had to face. I’m at that place now. A place where I am proud of myself for all that I have accomplished. With no comparison to anyone. Because now, I choose me. I stand alone as an individual. I am strong and sure of myself as I am. I can do whatever I want to do…with myself, with my life.
I was on the wrong path for awhile. I guess I had to go on it to figure out what I really want. And do I want to spend another few years trying to get a degree just to tie myself down to a desk? Chained by the demands of someone else? Nope. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life on someone else’s time. I’m no longer working towards that. So…I’m on an alternative route. Of course I’m still working. No reason to give up great benefits and decent pay right now. Being an adult means you have to be an adult. And I like to live alone 🙂 I can’t imagine living with my mother or even having roommates. OMG 😰 But, it’s time I work towards the freedom I want. So no more dabbling. I don’t have anymore time to waste.
I will continue to write because I’m a writer. I just may not be able to as much as I’d love to. I have some hardcore studying to do for the next few months and that will take a good chuck of my time. Not to mention I have a social life that I’m not willing to give up either. So BALANCE is very important. Other projects will have to be put aside for now.
It’s hard. Life is hard. I keep saying that, lol. And I’m sure you feel the same at times. I’ve been thinking a lot about some of the entrepreneurs I follow. They all have their own unique story. I have a story to tell. Everyone loves a great story right? 💁 And I think my story would really resonate with a lot of young women trying to find themselves as well as single moms trying to accomplish more. Instead of starting a project geared towards this, I’m going to keep a journal of my progress instead. Creating an actual blueprint will take time and like I said earlier, I can’t dabble in too much right now. I’ve set a 3 month goal for this whole real estate thing. That has to be my main focus. The older I get, I find it even harder to focus 🙈 Jupiter is in Virgo right now though…I got this 🙂